Condition Of Fear

Where is one most vulnerable if not the bathroom? We are stripped down in every sense of the word, bereft of clothes and defenses. We step behind the door and lock it, trusting that the world now cannot trespass on us as we lay bare all that which billions of dollars and millions of man-hours are dedicated to concealing and making look better. Frankly, I for one find the mirror to be a little too judgmental. So it was in this bastion that fear was struck into my heart, shattering the illusion.

It was late afternoon, and time at long last for the shower that signals to the day that I am ready for whatever it is to throw at me in the waning hours of daylight. I tend to be on autopilot, getting the water going, undressing, stepping into the shower and only then discovering whether I have what I need in order to conduct a successful shower. Usually it's all there, and I guess I got complacent. On this day, it was not all there.

I was fooled by the presence of two bottles of hair conditioner. To my recollection, one was the nearly empty one which I meant to exhaust before switching to the other, a new bottle. I found on this day that the dregs of the older had indeed been completely tapped. I switched it with the other, when lo! The supposedly new and full bottle lifted as easily as the empty, betraying its condition of almost total emptiness! I found just enough between them to adequately if not luxuriously condition my hair.

All the while, I furiously speculated at what had become of the better part of the new bottle's contents. Immediate suspicion fell on the roommate, who I would never peg as any kind of thief, but who I imagined might have through some accident spilled the contents of the bottle and cleaned it up in my absences or indisposition. Upon conclusion of the shower, I exampled the area of floor where I believed this would have happened. Not any cleaner than it ought to be. Then I looked in the cabinet under my sink. There lay the actual new bottle of conditioner, still where I had put it so that it would not be in the way by the shower.