Get

Yesterday I spoke of seeing a live comedy show. At the theater where the show was held, one spends a lot of time waiting in line before getting in to whichever show. Much of the enjoyment of going, in fact, is derived from chatting with old friends and making new ones in the interminable period of being in that line. It starts in front of the theater, and snakes down the block. You can figure what your prospects of getting in on a standby ticket are by what business the line stretches to.

Every so often, someone will come around and check names, issue hand stamps, or just tell you to clear the sidewalk. The theater, in the interest of being a good neighbor, tries to ensure that their line does not inconvenience passersby or people seeing to patronize one of the aforementioned businesses. It reminds me of a thing in football. Each football team has a whole array of coaches, most of whom have many duties during the game as well as between games, except for one.

The Line

It's interesting how certain trends hold true without any hint of a good reason. The ones that interest me the most concern bad things which hinder me as I do my best to get the the day productively, happily and in one piece. I won't waste your time with such frivolous complaints as the habit of smoke from a barbeque grill following me around no matter what I do to evade or anything else of the kind. I care too much about you to presume upon the commitment of time you make to my words in such a fashion. No, the thing I'm thinking about is entirely serious and important, and could not be characterized as some mild gripe. It has to do with lines, or queues, as I understand the British call them. Lines aren't pleasant, but that we have them is a mark of lingering civility. That mark is continually tested for me.

Just why is it that so often when I wait in line, the one just ahead of me has some terribly intractable problem? It's always some great crisis, and never one which is easily handled by the clerk. It truly is uncanny the consistency with which this is the case. My sympathies tend to lie with the clerk, who invariably seems to be laboring mightily to explain things to the customer, who is often only ever right on account of the old axiom which says so. That customer is likely to be drawing things out by being obstinate. I think it's likely that the customer lives a live during which they must lie down and take whatever indignity or affront fate puts to them. The one exception is probably when they feel they have the license to aggressively respond to unfavorable judgements at the library or fast food restaurant.