A Fantasy Parsed

I was watching one of those very gadget-oriented films the other night when I was called away to the urgent business of visiting a bar with friends. After closing time, I returned to the movie with a rather altered state of consciousness, and started thinking in practical terms about what I would do with such a gadget. I used to fantasize about having a proton pack, a light saber and all the other things, but somehow the fantasies remained couched in the reality of the film, never becoming integrated into my own reality. It's quite a different thing when you do that.

For the sake of argument, let's say it was a laser gun that I had. The fun fantasy would be brandishing it all over town and firing it willy-nilly at any and all targets of opportunity. I enjoy thinking that it would go that way for a minute or two, then I start getting realistic. Laser gun or not, there are laws. I would probably have to go through a 'cooling off' period before even acquiring one, and then I would probably have to get a concealed carry license, not that this would guarantee my ability to carry the laser into private businesses. Do you see how this is getting less and less fun in practice?

Even though at this point in the fantasy I am legally in ownership of a laser gun and have the proper licenses for carrying it, I remain at the mercy of laws governing the firing of the weapon. I probably only could fire it in self-defense or while on a sanctioned firing range. In truth though, this not being a conventional weapon, firing ranges might very well prohibit its use on their property, and special laws might even be drafted concerning its use in all circumstances, self-defense included.

All this being the case, the truth behind such a fantasy is that I probably would keep the laser gun in a box in a closet at home, and would only occasionally get it out to admire for a while now and then. I would also have to clean in in whatever fashion is appropriate to such a weapon, lest it degrade in its disuse. Eventually I would probably sell it on account of needing the money for groceries or to pay utility bills. It's an unsatisfying fantasy, as you can see. I think I'll focus on women.