Lothario, Evidently

You see funny things on the train, and if I've gone with this general conceit before plenty of times, it's because there's always something fresh and new. Today and tomorrow you will read of noteworthy incidents that transpired over the weekend. To begin with, I had a rather eventful Saturday that called on me to ride the rails a good bit, so the odds were certainly in favor of something weird or crazy happening. My luck just isn't so good that it wouldn't.

After making my way most of the way home after my day's plans were concluded, I really had the idea that I might be home scott free. It was not to be. After boarding my second train, the gentlemen near me motioned for me to take off my headphones. Being the good-natured rube that I am, I consented. Do you know, good reader, that his first words were to compare me with Tom Hanks in his star-making show "Bosom Buddies"? That is no joke.

After joking that I didn't have the titular bosoms, I gathered that he meant my hair, and that is a new hair comparison for me. None have been flattering. In any case, he and I talked about my ample hair and his once-ample hair. He was entirely bald, and we discussed genetics and the like. It seemed ordinary until he started describing the manner in which his hair had played a part in his liasons with women. He was rather descriptive, unfortunately.

Believe it or not, that was not by a long shot the worst encounter I've had. Compared with situations where I can imagine having suffered harm, this was really a relatively pleasant experience, although I did not welcome it and never am eager to engage with any stranger on a train. Hitchcock taught me better than to go talking with people who are enthusiastic about the idea. It's those who discourage conversation that you would want to have it with.