My House Of Usher

Mostly in my apartment, there are lights on. Any room someone's in has the lights on, of course. Somebody is home much of the time. There's a light on in the bathroom if we have the fan running in there, because they operate on the same switch. There's also a little light above the stove that we tend to have on all the time as a way of seeing where you're going when the rest of the lights are off. This just seems like a safety thing.

It's not quite what I'm used to from growing up. At night anyway, it's my recollection that all the lights were off. If one needed to move about at night, only those lights needed were to be activated, and then deactivated just as soon as one was through with them. That all seemed logical, so I had no quarrel with the policy, but it was all the more logical that I abide by it in any case, lest I come in for some kind of punishment.

It's funny how it goes though, that even those things you'd like to not do when young end up getting ingrained in you. Like I said, I had no problem with turning the lights on and off, but I don't know whether it would have happened on its own when I was young. These days, I feel that the default is having the lights off, and I have to override that to honor the wishes of roommates when they are known to me.

It's more than the practicality that has me keeping the lights off when they're not needed. There's something I like about a dark apartment that appeals to me. There's a significance about the night. It's the time when you are supposed to be in bed, so there's a transgressive quality in being up. Having the lights on all the time at night robs a night owl of the feeling that they are being bad or irregular. It feels good to be bad, so I prefer to allow the night its influence over my home.