Never Again

Years ago, when DVDs seemed to be a collectible item and Netflix was not yet on the scene, I used to watch the same movies again and again. I wasn't going to go out to the video store. That kind of spontaneity was beyond me, and there was reward in watching the same things over and over anyway. Intimate familiarity was a pleasure, and total familiarity was always elusive. Each viewing of a movie yielded new details and enjoyment.

I can't manage to invest in a movie any longer the time necessary to get that. Somehow there is rarely the time to watch a movie twice, even if it is a movie a really want to. Many movies I can't bear to watch twice for reasons that have nothing to do with quality. With the other ones though, it's just a matter of time. Some movies I love dearly enough to watch over and over, though they are few in number. 'Executive Suite' is one, and there are others.

How can I justify it, though? There are so many movies I want to watch, and I know I'll go to my final resting place having missed out on many of them even if I do nothing else but work down that list. I'm obviously not going to do that, since I want to not just experience but to create. Even if that weren't the case, there are books and albums and a thousand other types of things I want to experience. How can I do anything more than twice?

Some things deserve it though, and I've got to accept that some things will be left unexplored for the great enjoyment that can be had by further delving into what is already proven. I don't want to know all things superficially well. I want to know somethings better than anyway. It's like a woman, maybe. What reward is there in being with countless multitudes when an everlasting relationship with one grows deeper with every encounter? Come to think of it, forget the movie thing. I just want to find the woman.