Presently Speaking

Christmas is past, but for me one thing lingers in my mind, and that is buying gifts. It does happen to a lesser extent through the year, after all. It's not something that's hard for me as a rule, but can be more or less difficult depending on the person in question. That must be true for everyone. I guess you don't want it to be too easy, which suggests in my mind someone who is single minded about conveying what they want all the time. It just sounds very selfish. A person seems more virtuous if they're giving off clues unwittingly, but you do need those clues. I'm not interested in some kind of great challenge.

I believe in gifts that are personal and reflect my knowledge of and connection with the person in question. I am not against receiving gift cards, but prefer not to give them if I can help it. They can be personal to some extent provided they are not cash cards (which do have their value as gifts), but I find them unsatisfying. They say that stores love selling gift cards because a surprising number of people don't even use them, and those that do invariably spend a little more than the value of the card. I've found that to be true, but as I've said my objection is in giving them, not receiving.

It seems as if the balance has shifted in my family and that my father, once the toughest of the bunch, has become the easiest. I hope in saying that that I have been making the right choices and do not appear to be imaginative and out of touch. It's not easy to have one's finger on the pulse of desires when living very far away. I sift through all I know of events back home and conversations, and try to glean from that some indications of what will be best. Directly questioning people never seems to yield any useful information. You got a lot of 'I don't know's and 'I don't want anything's, which you know are not true.

I am not much better about telling people what I want. I want things all year, and then all memory of them escapes me when the time comes to tell. I should keep track or something. As a boy, I used to do that. Really what I did was to make a kind of collage from print ads which outlined what I wanted. I guess that indicates that I'm some kind of visual learner. This recently past Christmas I think I did pretty well at helping people shop for me. After all, doing unto others is what it's all about. As for the other end of things,  I got by. It's the thought that counts, right? Isn't that what you say if you have doubts about what you've gotten people?